Different Ways to Wear a Scaf

Post by Brenda Hayes.

Credits to Brenda Hayes for posting this video.

Visiting the Northern Part of Bretagne (including Le Mont St. Michel)

When we buy new electronic gadgets like cellphones or computers there are these images that are pre-installed in them, they serve as sample pictures of the device.  I remember often seeing a beautiful image but I don't remember seeing any information about it, where it can be found or what it is.  It might have been noted as the image name but I just don't remember seeing it.  Anyway, the image I'm talking about is the famous Mont St Michel which is located in the region of Normandy in France.  It's in the northwestern part of the country at the boundary of the regions Normandy (Normandie) and Brittany (Bretagne).  One day, I came across this image again on the internet and at that moment I was already married to my husband (who is French), so I thought why not ask him about it.  Indeed he told me about this wonderful world heritage which he had already even visited and he promised to take me there one day.

I arrived in France in 2012 but we didn't get the chance to visit this famous and historical place until last weekend because we lived in the French West Indies (Caribbean).  Well, the first time I really saw it (from a distance) was on our very long drive from Picardy (Picardie) to Brittany on a hot summer day of 2013.  That was a few days after our arrival in the metropolis from our stay in the Caribbean.  I remember the excitement I felt even by just seeing it from afar.  Then last week my husband told me we're going away for the weekend, he'd like to show me the northern part of the region and then we'd go as far as "Le Mont St Michel".  I was like a child giggling for excitement the night before we left off.  

Before reaching our main destination we had made a few stops.  We left at past ten on a Saturday morning after running a few errands and we arrived past twelve in a village called Plélo.  My husband took me to a local farm/restaurant where he spent a part of his childhood.  It was so amazing to see him rediscover an important part of his growing up years and it actually brought me back some childhood memories of my own because the smell of the place was very much like the smell of my grandparents' house, it was the smell of the fire woods used in cooking.  I love the cozy feeling.  We had a very good "crêpe bretonne" which we ate with their homemade cider.  It was sumptuous and the ambiance was just so homey.  After eating we had a quick tour around the farm and then we hit the road again for the next destination, the town of Paimpol.  

galette - a crepe made out of black wheat

Char à Banc - restaurant/farm in Plélo

My husband had always wanted to show me where his parents came from.  It's a town in the northern part of the Brittany region.  This interests me so much as well because it is a part of him.  He spent most of his childhood vacations there, at his grandfather's house.  I was expecting to see a quite little village but it took me by surprise.  I found myself in a busy city with a port filled with really nice sailing vessels.  Well, it was a very beautiful sunny spring day so tourists sprang from almost everywhere and locals took advantage of the weather as well.  We went to visit the place where his grandfather used to live then to the part of the town where her mother grew up and we also paid visits to the tombs of his elders.  It was a beautiful special day.  For dinner, he took me out to a very good seafood restaurant in a village called "Loguivy de la mer".  It was quite pricey but we just decided to spoil ourselves that day!  And the dessert was at "crêperie Morel" a famous "crêperie" in Paimpol.  When our stomachs got a bit too much to eat for the day and our feet got weary after all the walking, we took shelter in an average hotel just a few meters from the port.  The price was correct, we paid 46€ the night without breakfast.  

Paimpol - this is facing the port.

seafood plate in Loguivy de la mer 

The next day was THE day we went up to Le Mont St Michel.  It was a very beautiful Sunday morning.  The sun was so up and the sky as blue as a summer day!  We left Paimpol after a quick breakfast.  It was a long two hour and a half drive.  We arrived at the parking lot of the heritage around 12:40.  The lot is quite far from the mount itself, as part of their efforts to preserve this historical place.  From the parking lot, visitors have the options to either take the shuttle buses for free which would take them directly to the mount (it'll only take a few minutes), take a forty minute walk or take their bikes (if they brought some with them).  We took the forty minute walk because we wanted to enjoy the view as we get nearer and nearer the mount.  It was so beautiful with the perfect weather and there were not so many people either.  I was literally jumping for excitement as we got nearer and nearer.

We are a fan of this very famous HBO series called Game of Thrones and visiting the mount was like being in one of the kingdoms of Westeros (if you know what I'm talking about)!  Anyway, we entered a huge gate just like what we see in old close villages or kingdoms in movies and inside is a centuries old city, houses made of stone which are now used as gift shops, restaurants, hotel and snack houses.  We climbed all the way up and made a first stop at the chapel of Joan of Arc then we made some more stops every now and then to enjoy the magnificent view as we keep ascending.  The mount itself was packed with visitors but not as much as during a summer day I suppose.  We decided to visit the abbey and monastery, this is the the place they call "top God" if I got it right.  We had to pay 9€ each (without a guide).  The price was worth it!  It's my most favorite part of the visit.  There are many enormous halls and the huge chapel with the blessed sacrament.  Being a catholic, I found it so holy and I couldn't stop myself from being teary eyed as I thanked The Almighty for the beautiful opportunity of being there.  Behind the huge chapel and in the middle of the halls is a beautiful garden.  When we descended we used the stares near the wall and we had the very beautiful view of the sea.  It was low tide though but it was still amazing especially with the seagulls flying all around.  I found it even magical in a way.  This world heritage is visited by around 3 million tourists per year and among them are of course Filipinos.  When we were at one of the souvenir shops my husband spotted some tourists and he told me "they're Filipinos" (he actually has an eye for Filipinos, he knows one when he sees one).  I smiled at them and as they smiled back, I then directly asked if they're Filipinos which they confirmed.  I was so happy because they are from Mindanao so they speak Bisaya too like me.  Oh how much I miss talking to Filipinos in person!  So, we had our chika moment for a few minutes.  After a few minutes of shopping (because the prices are hilarious as such the case in most tourist spots) we could no longer ignore our starving stomachs and tired feet.  We looked for the "not so expensive" food but we couldn't really find a lot and we ended up in a 3 star restaurant.  The price was "correct" but their stars were nowhere to be found from the food presentation to the ambiance and the staff!  Anyway, it wasn't so bad either..we were just expecting a better service due to their "stars".

Le Mont St Michel

Holy Sacrament chapel

After the memorable visit of the mount my husband told me we would make one last stop before heading home.  He took me to the old city called St. Malo.  On the way there we passed by a lot of farms and really beautiful villages where all houses are made of stone.  We took the way along the coastal area and view was breathtaking!  It is so flat and we saw a huge herd of sheep and a few kilometers away was a "bio" chicken farm and then a pig farm.  It was my first time to see a pig farm where pigs are out in the meadow.  It was so beautiful and we often saw advertisements about "vegetables for sale" fresh from the farm.  I enjoyed it so much.

Pig farm - photo grabbed from: www.pitchup.com

We arrived in St. Malo's Intra-Muros around past five in the afternoon.  I was again awestruck!  It's a close "ancient city".  We entered a huge gate again and inside is an old city with almost everything made of stone.  Of course it gave us the feeling of being in "Westeros" again.  It was very beautiful.  We climbed and walked beside its walls facing the sea.  The sun was still so bright but the wind was starting to be chilly.  Our energy level is starting to get low and the smell of crêpe all over the place was a torture since we don't want to "spoil ourselves" for two consecutive days.  We only bought a postcard  from there and then we decided to head home.    We've done enough walking for the day!

St Malo

For someone who doesn't like driving, it was a very long way so I am a super proud and grateful wife!  It was the longest drive my husband did, all for love and with love!  We got home at exactly 9:40 in the evening and that concluded our lovely weekend!

Now, I can say that I have quite visited the Brittany region, from north to south and it's so beautiful.  I already mentioned this in one of my blog posts but I'd say it again.  If you ever get the chance to visit France, try visiting this region.  You'll enjoy beautiful landscapes and delicious foods! ツ 

Why Do People Get Married or Want To Get Married?

Photo grabbed from: www.sandtonshul.co.za

Although in today's world and generation society places lesser and lesser value to marriage, people still do it or want to do it.  Well, I did want it and wish for it when I was single and I still know quite a number of people planning and wanting to do it.  Why is this so?  There are many possible answers to this question.  Personally, here's what I have to say:

Marriage gives people a sense of emotional stability.  Though there are some who say it's just a paper yet I'd beg to disagree.  Yes it's a paper but it is a very important paper.  This paper means a lifetime commitment (though unfortunately not all couples stick to this commitment).  When you are in a couple but not yet married there are these possibilities of not taking some things or decisions too seriously because well, there's no great impact really, due to the lack of marriage.  If the decision leads to a break up well then that's it.  You may suffer from heartaches and sleepless nights but that's the most you could worry about.  Whereas, if you're married you'd think twice and be more careful with each decisions you make because breaking up doesn't just mean heartaches, sleepless nights, packing your things and moving out, it can mean a very long, traumatic, and strenuous divorce or annulment process.  I have never been this emotionally stable until I got married but this is entirely dependent on the person you choose to marry, so be careful!  You choose the wrong person and the last thing you'll have will be emotional stability.

Marriage gives people a structure in creating a family.  When you marry the person you choose to be with for the rest of your life then most likely you also plan of procreating, extending  your bloodline and contributing to our growing society.  This might not be true to each married couple but a large number of married couples would agree to this, I suppose.  Yes you may still have a family even without marriage but this still remains  one of the norms of the society.  It is still better to "start right".  It may sound a bit too righteous but isn't this how you'd wish your children to start their future families?  But of course this is just an option, everyone can start making their families the way they want.

Marriage gives people security.  When you finally said yes to each other, this is the yes for a lifetime together.  So you just got the assurance of having someone with you through it all if both of you will be true to your vows.  The road can be rough and some nights can be long but alas!  You will have someone with you! This is the kind of security I'm talking about.

Marriage makes you happy.  As long as you choose the right person then you'll be left with no choice but to agree with me.  One night, on our random conversation before falling asleep, I asked my husband what his idea is about why people get married and he answered "to be happy".  It didn't take him even a second to give me an answer and he elaborated saying he has never been really happy until he found and married me.  I couldn't agree more because I definitely share the same happiness.  Perhaps my husband's answer is a little too general but this is how I'd make it specific:  it is the kind of happiness you feel when you wake up beside each other everyday or the way you just can't get your mind off each other when you are apart; the kind of happiness you feel when you take care of each other even after a heated argument; the kind of happiness you feel when you forgive each other; the kind of happiness you feel when you cuddle after making love and the kind of happiness you feel when you look at the future together.

So, you are thinking of finally tying the knot?  If you think you have found THE ONE then by all means, go ahead!  There is nothing to be afraid of when you really love each other because as one french woman told us "avec l'amour tout va" meaning: with love everything is gonna be alright.

WHY I WROTE WHAT I WROTE (ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ғɪʟɪᴘɪɴᴏ-ғʀᴇɴᴄʜ ᴡᴇᴅᴅɪɴɢ)

image grabbed from sodahead.com

When I started this blog it was just really to free myself from boredom.  I remember I was actually trying to figure my life out and I was lonely.  I love writing, I wanna do it when I'm sad, when I'm happy, when I'm lonely, when I'm upset or even when I'm confused (and because of that I don't always post what I write).  While I love sharing my ideas I also don't want people to read five paragraphs of ranting especially when the reason is kind of personal.  I don't post a lot in this blog but I love blogging.  Sometimes I just browse through my blog and enjoy what I've written.  If you read my blog title and description it's actually quite "general", it's just about sharing my thoughts, experiences and all.  However, when I started posting my experiences about my interracial wedding process this blog became a sort of "reference" to some couples going through the same thing.  I've been receiving some comments or questions every now and then which I gladly answer.

I'm gonna have to take you back to when my husband and I decided to tie the knots.  Normally, getting married isn't a very complicated process unless your case is a little out-of-the-ordinary.  I say out-of-the-ordinary for us due to our different nationalities.  We were scouting for information because there was no one to ask.  We didn't have any idea about the legal procedures in getting married, none of us have done it before and he's French while I'm a Filipino so non of our family or friends would know how we'd go about it.  The only thing we knew that time was that we were determined to SAY YES to forever, if you think about it that's the most important thing, of course!  But the road to saying yes wasn't that easy to find.  We both did some research, I asked around some married friends how they did it because even if none of them had married a French husband I was sure that there must be something "generic" about getting married, some common things to do in getting married in the Philippines whether both of you are Filipinos or not.  My husband on the other hand spent a lot of time searching for some information on the internet, making some phone calls, asking questions, sending emails, contacting his embassy etc...  Then he found some very interesting blogs describing the process while I also found some discussion boards talking about the same things.  After all the time consuming (yet worth every second) process, we were able to say our YESes and I thought to myself, it's actually a good idea to write down all the things that we did because one day when we get the chance the read them then we can say "oh wow!  We did all that?".  And besides, my writing about our experience might actually help other people too like those blogs we've read did to us.

So I did it and true enough, few months later I've received some comments and questions about what I've written.  I know how it feels like to be in the clouds and just not to know how to go about certain legal procedures so I actually have the sympathy to these people asking me questions.  However, at one point something bothered me and when I shared it to my husband he shares the same sentiments and his reaction was even stronger than mine.  I have received some questions from some women asking me for some clarifications about the information that I have written because they want to marry their French boyfriend who they will meet for the first time.  At first I was hesitant to answer their questions because I was thinking "how can you decide to marry someone you haven't really been with yet, physically?" but then I said, that's their problem right there because when I was scouting for information the last thing I wanted was for someone to question my intentions and my decisions.  But to be clear on the matter, my husband and I didn't get married the first nor the second time we actually met each other.  This might not be really important to some people, you know, getting married the first time you are actually with the person but it is important for us.  Well, we all have our stories and our circumstances, the most important thing is that we are happy with our decisions because in the end it's us who live our lives not the spectators around us.

Now, I'm just glad I can help and I pray that these people (mostly women) who ask me for some information about the wedding process (between a Filipino and a French national) are actually marrying for the right reasons because France is a very far place to end up with the wrong person and it's not easy to be struggling marital issues when you don't have family and friends to run to.  Thankfully I have been very lucky and blessed with the man I have married but I have also met some foreign women here who come from far away places too and who haven't been as lucky and to be honest they are in a pretty nasty situation especially those who have a hard time in speaking the French language.  So, ask away if you have some questions and I'd still be glad to answer them if it is of my knowledge but before you plan on saying yes to someone try to know the person as much as possible and if you have a doubt then take that doubt seriously because you should know the depth of the water before you take the plunge.  I hate the idea of being one of the factors (even the smallest factor) on how you got into a possible unwanted situation.

Vivre en France (Living in France)

Sorry, it's been a while since my last entry.  So much to do, so little time.  I feel bad about not being able to write often however there are only twenty-four hours in a day and sometimes they just seem not to be enough.  After our moving from Martinique around the second quarter of last year we haven't stopped having "things to do".  When we got here in the metropolis we had to settle down and our flat badly needed some important renovations.  Now we're settled and are almost done with the renovations so we got a little time to breathe and some time for me to write too!

I have been living in France since 2012 but we were in Martinique (a french island in the Caribbean) so it was a different experience.  In this post I will be talking about living in a part of France in Europe, the France that most people know.

I saw a glimpse of the metropolis when I arrived in 2012.  Just a glimpse because the next day after our arrival (I arrived in France with my husband) we had to take another flight to the Caribbean.  This time it's a bit more than a glimpse.  We landed in Paris on a hot summer day of August.  My heavy heart from leaving our island paradise was lifted when I saw the "civilization" and the new things in it.  We stayed on vacation for a little over a week in Senlis at my brother-in-law's flat, not so far from Paris.  I loved the laid back environment of Senlis and Chantilly (the city next to Senlis) but I also loved the excitement when we visited Paris.

After the quick vacation, it's back to reality for us; we hit the road again for a long way to Brest, a city located in the northwestern part of France.  This is wear my husband comes from and this is where our flat is, this is yet again another "home".  

In Europe, the first thing that someone from a tropical place would find weird would most probably be seeing the sun at night during summer.  Yes, for days I felt disoriented with time, it takes a while to get used to bright nights.  After being lucky to have had a transition in Martinique after leaving the Philippines I got another luck with the seasonal transition too.  We arrived on a summer so I was able to gradually feel the temperature as the seasons change. Since it's my first time living in a place with four seasons, each day brings me a surprise.  I spent a very beautiful summer.  I loved picking black berries and seashells and I loved walking in the parks too but sun bathing was one thing I didn't enjoy so much.  The water in Europe remains too cold for me even on a summer.  I didn't like going to the beach, staying  under the sun and not being able to get into the water when it felt a little too hot.  

Then came autumn.  I find this season very beautiful too.  I saw the leaves of the trees change colors, from green to yellow to gold and lastly to brown before the all eventually fell.  One day we were on the road and I was awestruck!  It was magical seeing a very colorful forest on a mountain and right on top was a line of windmills.  It was one of the most beautiful views I have seen in my life so far.  Then the wind started to feel a little chilly especially at dusk and the sunsets were no longer as late and flowers started to stop blooming.

The temperature continued dropping and then came winter.  We started having sleet storms every now and then.  I remember the first time I saw a sleet storm I was so amazed that I even took a video.  But of course!  This is something that never happens in my tropical home.  In some places winter can be harsh but fortunately not in this part of France.  If you look at the map you'll see that we are one of those lucky places who got the most elevated temperature for the season.  However, though we got the elevated temperature it is still winter and I am still an islander so the cold still bites.  Thankfully my husband got me prepared for the season, he got me my first winter clothes and though winter is considered negative by some, for me it remains interesting.  It's very nice and exciting wearing winter clothes because again it's something new for me.  The cold weather is painful but as long as you are warmly clothed then you're good to go!  I love it when it's cold and sunny, they call it here "froid et sec" which literally means "cold and dry".  The cold air feels so nice on the face and you still feel warm inside with the help of your winter coat, leather gloves and boots.   

Aside from the weather, the way of life here is completely different too but as a Filipino this doesn't bother me.  We Filipinos are known to be flexible and are easily able cope up with changes no matter what they are.  Living here has made me realize a lot of good things about my country, good things that we most of the time just take for granted because for us "it's nothing but normal".  I'm talking about the simple things like always having someone to ask when we are shopping for example.  Here, they don't have as much employees as in our country because the salary is too high so sometimes you find yourself in a situation where you badly need help but there's no one around.  Either you continue with your shopping or just leave the shop and try finding what you need somewhere else, thus leaving you a bit frustrated.  Another good example is having someone to pack your groceries for you.  Back home if we go grocery shopping we take the cart, pick what we need or what we want, place them on the counter and pay.  We don't touch our groceries after we place them on the counter, in most cases, each cashier is paired with a friendly and helpful "bagger", the one who will pack your things carefully in shopping bags and even take them to the parking if you wish.  Whereas here, you do everything yourself, at some grocery stores you even do the job of the cashier and you bring your own shopping bags otherwise you'll pay for them.  Then if we need fuel for our cars we just stop in a service station, wait for the "gasoline boy" to fill our tank and then pay.  This isn't the case here.  Here it's automated, there is no "gasoline boy" so you stop and turn off your engine, get out of your car, fill the tank yourself and pay using your card, get back in and go.  These are just some of the things that we take for granted which we'll appreciate once we see how these people live without "our conveniences".

Now let's talk about food.  It'll be in a general manner though, I'll be writing another post for details.  Contrary to what most Filipinos think, French people are rice eaters too but not in the same quantity that we do, way far from that (with my husband as an exemption because he always claims to be a Filipino).  Here they eat potatoes almost as much as we eat rice.  I say almost because breakfast is already out of the equation.  I'm a good eater but there are some French foods that I just can't eat like "cuisses de grenouille"  (frog legs) and "les escargots" (snails).  Otherwise, I can eat most of the foods on the table.  Though my husband isn't a cheese eater he still lets me taste them and frankly, yes they do smell bad and some people say that the more they stink the tastier they get.  Well, thanks but no thanks because I could never get myself eat a really strong odored cheese, especially goat cheese.  One day I tried eating a goat cheese and I really couldn't help but puke (excuse me for the detail).  I looked after a few goats as a kid and eating the goat cheese was like being in front of a male goat, the smell was too strong and I just couldn't find something good neither in the texture nor in the taste but at least I tried.  Then about the meat, they are more diverse here.   Most people eat beef, veal, pork and lamb.  Back home we are more into pork, beef and rarely goat back in the countryside where I come from and where my parents still live.  France is so famous with their best quality meat and our butcher is one of the best butchers of the country so I can really attest to this!  Then they  have the "charcuterie" (a branch of cooking devoted for meat products like ham, sausages and the like), the "pâtisserie" (a type of bakery specializing in pastries and sweets), "les bon vins" (the good wines) and other kinds of alcohol like pastis (anise based) cognac (brandy) and armagnac (brandy).  I am not a liqueur specialist so I may have missed out on some other liqueurs that can be found in France.  Lastly, they have the desserts to die for!  The best cake I have tasted (in my life, so far) was in Chantilly during our vacation.  There are a lot of good foods here so like I've said I'll write a separate post for them.

So far I am enjoying our stay here in the metropolis despite the new adjustments that I had to make.  I find it more interesting than my husband because I didn't grow up here.  One thing I love too is how people treat me or how people see me.  In Martinique people were looking at me differently, probably because there are not a lot of Asians there, unlike here where you often see Asians almost everywhere you go.  Here we also have the convenience of having almost everything just near by, needless to drive for a long time to go grocery shopping, see the doctor or go to the pharmacy.  My husband had chosen really well when he bought this flat.  

Since I have married a very good guide then yes, I've already seen a lot of beautiful places in Bretagne (our region).  I have seen many beautiful ancient churches, historical places, the beautiful coasts and landscapes of Bretagne.  If you get the chance to travel to France, aside from visiting Paris you should also try visiting this region.  Trust me you'll never regret it and people here are kind and warmer too!  

All in all, I can say: La France est franchement très jolie!!!

Chateau de Chantilly

la Crêperie Blé Noir - Bois de Keroual

Château de Brest

Concarneau 

St Renan

Palourde farcies

mûre